'If you want flashes and particular experiences of romantic love, read novels. If you want to understand this central quality of human nature to its roots, read Why We Love.' Wilson In Why We Love, renowned anthropologist Helen Fisher offers a new map of the phenomenon of love-from its origins in the brain to the thrilling havoc it creates in our bodies and behav 'If you want flashes and particular experiences of romantic love, read novels. If you want to understand this central quality of human nature to its roots, read Why We Love.' Wilson In Why We Love, renowned anthropologist Helen Fisher offers a new map of the phenomenon of love-from its origins in the brain to the thrilling havoc it creates in our bodies and behavior. Working with a team of scientists to scan the brains of people who had just fallen madly in love, Fisher proved what psychologists had until recently only suspected: when you fall in love, specific areas of the brain 'light up' with increased blood flow. This sweeping new book uses this data to argue that romantic passion is hardwired into our brains by millions of years of evolution. It is not an emotion; it is a drive as powerful as hunger. Provocative, enlightening, engaging, and persuasive, Why We Love offers radical new answers to age-old questions: what love is, who we love-and how to keep love alive. What a huge letdown! Totally overrated. This subject truly fascinates me, but the author merely builds on the research of others and pads it with quotes from popular literature, poetry and song lyrics, as though that proves a point. ![]() If you take out all those quotes it's probably half as thick. It's like she just googled 'Love' and included every quote she could find. Reads like a so-so undergrad paper. The only thing the author herself actually brings to the table is the notion that certain neur What a huge letdown! Totally overrated. This subject truly fascinates me, but the author merely builds on the research of others and pads it with quotes from popular literature, poetry and song lyrics, as though that proves a point. If you take out all those quotes it's probably half as thick. It's like she just googled 'Love' and included every quote she could find. Reads like a so-so undergrad paper. The only thing the author herself actually brings to the table is the notion that certain neurotransmitters may play a role the body's chemistry during times of heightened emotion, and that's still based on the research of others and is in no way a new theory. Also unsettling is her complete failure to acknowledge the late Dorothy Tennov who practically invented the investigative study of romantic love. She clearly references Tennov's work yet does not go so far as to name her. But this Helen Fisher is the talking head we get whenever the media wants an expert on the subject. Read Stendhal's 'Love' and Tennov's 'Love and Limerence'. Helen Fisher is a snake. I love this book. It provided me with all the hidden secretes there is to love. Once finished with this book I no longer feel dumbfounded about mine or other people’s actions when it comes to romance, lust, commitment and passion. I recommend that everyone reads this book because love is a complex system and Helen Fisher does an amazing job in making it clear that love is not something to fear even when everything doesn’t seem to be working out because love is about an individual’s personal grow I love this book. It provided me with all the hidden secretes there is to love. Once finished with this book I no longer feel dumbfounded about mine or other people’s actions when it comes to romance, lust, commitment and passion. I recommend that everyone reads this book because love is a complex system and Helen Fisher does an amazing job in making it clear that love is not something to fear even when everything doesn’t seem to be working out because love is about an individual’s personal growth in life and that is something that is always successful. For a long time I couldn’t understand why anthropologists call us human animals. We are just pretending to be cultivated; there is so much about humankind and civilisation that still functions from the heart of pure basic primate brain and our evolution is nowhere close to the end. This book should be mandatory read. In the last few months I have read enough of anthropology books to finally start connecting different topics into one unified field and what I’ve learned is that we don’t kn For a long time I couldn’t understand why anthropologists call us human animals. We are just pretending to be cultivated; there is so much about humankind and civilisation that still functions from the heart of pure basic primate brain and our evolution is nowhere close to the end. This book should be mandatory read. In the last few months I have read enough of anthropology books to finally start connecting different topics into one unified field and what I’ve learned is that we don’t know how we became what we became. But nevertheless things that I've learned, things that we are made of - are fucking with my brain because of the magnificent mechanism we live in, which we call our body. Further reading on spiritualism, neuroscience, psychology, alternative and secret history of humankind will help me greatly to understand some of the forbidden and censured facts about our DNA/mind and the evolution of our physical, emotional, mindful, intuitive and spiritual body. What I am coming to realise is that we have forgotten so much about us. We are completely on the wrong tracks, we are completely something else from what the system is trying to teach us and break us with. We are absolutely here on Earth for a purpose, what that is, I still don’t know, but we are far from the coincidence and far from the logical cell growth. Anthropology helps me deal with these existential questions since it analyses facts and evidence and evolution. I am starting to realise the bigger picture in which we are supreme and magnificent, on an individual and then on collective level. Our brain in this phase cannot comprehend it instantly because of the central nervous system; it takes time, adaptation and a complete change of standardised systematic education since what I am trying to teach myself now is to learn to unlearn something daily. It is a frightening process since it is a field so wide and mainstream unknown and there are a lot of information that I have a very hard time digesting, but the more I learn about my body and the secret world I live in, the more I am aware of my expansion into the places where thoughts start disappearing and where I start connecting myself with the higher consciousness. The whole purpose. But the process is very subjective, individual and based solely on the object’s perception. Buy Dlaczego kochamy 1 by Helen Fisher (ISBN: 609) from Amazon's Book Store. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. Editions for Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love: (Paperback published in 2005), (Paperback published in 2015),. What I know is that the whole humankind is on the same path, just some learn it sooner, some will within hundred or more years. But we will all learn and know. It is the progress of evolution, if I have to use just this physical/matter word. All is one, all is one vibration, one big connection and time and space exist only in human parameters. What I didn’t understand until I started reading anthropology is how much general population doesn’t understand the magnificence of our physical brain, DNA and evolution, let alone things which are beyond our 3rd dimension and where we don’t depend on the narrow senses. Spectacular book, it talks about 3 different brains of love: 1. Romantic love 2. Lust (passionate love) 3. Attachment and how each of these brains are connected with different hormones and how all 3 are intertwined and work separately. Stunning, stunning material to know why we physically love, why he have sex and why we stay in relationships. ![]() I say, physically since H. Fisher can’t explain and is nowhere close explaining the all encompassed fusion that body makes due to this LOVE reaction. Since science can only measure palpable and the rest is left to individual comprehension and higher realms. In this wonderful book, the author takes a scientific approach to uncover and understand the perplexing and mystifying aspects of romantic love. The author throughout the course of this book uses findings from her experiments to substantiate that love is not just an ordinary feeling or emotion, rather it is a subtle mix between an urge and emotion, i.e. Controlled by a curious interplay among some neurotransmitters/stimulants like dopa-mine,nor-epinephrine,serotonin,vassopresin and oxycontin. The In this wonderful book, the author takes a scientific approach to uncover and understand the perplexing and mystifying aspects of romantic love. The author throughout the course of this book uses findings from her experiments to substantiate that love is not just an ordinary feeling or emotion, rather it is a subtle mix between an urge and emotion, i.e. Controlled by a curious interplay among some neurotransmitters/stimulants like dopa-mine,nor-epinephrine,serotonin,vassopresin and oxycontin. The author also makes certain conjectures as to why and how romantic love evolved from prehistory to modern times, and most of her inferences are quite interesting. Towards the end of the book, there is a chapter dedicated to a detailed discussion on the effects of break-up and how those affect men and women differently, their respective responses being quite different altogether. On the whole, I really enjoyed reading this book, and it provided me with some fascinating insights on romantic love, quite surprisingly I also found the tone of this book to be very engaging and filled with some great romantic quotes/poems, would definitely be recommending this book to everyone who has ever been in love. I recently read this book and I thought it was average. This book was about the science of love and why we love. It tells you about the different stages of love and how we deal with it on a mental, emotional, physical level within the body and mind. It was somewhat interesting to read and learn about the author's scientific theory of love. This book was based mainly on a couple of functional MRI studies of people in love. I liked all the details of the chemical images of the brains; however, I f I recently read this book and I thought it was average. This book was about the science of love and why we love. It tells you about the different stages of love and how we deal with it on a mental, emotional, physical level within the body and mind. It was somewhat interesting to read and learn about the author's scientific theory of love. This book was based mainly on a couple of functional MRI studies of people in love. I liked all the details of the chemical images of the brains; however, I found the writing of this book kind of repetitive. It was nice to learn that that the emotions that you believe are personal and unique are in fact related to specific chemical processes equal to all human beings. I think that this book is meant for a more mature audience and reading it now in 10th grade made it less interesting. Although I didn't really 'connect' with the book, it was thought provoking. It was different to think of love in a scientific way that can all be explained. I would recommend this book to others wanting to learn more about the scientific reasoning behind love. I was led to this book after watching Helen Fisher’s 2006 TED talk entitled “Why we love, why we cheat.” Both the talk and the book are largely based on Fisher’s study, begun in 1996, of students at SUNY Stony Brook campus, in which the brain activities of two groups of volunteers were scanned in an MRI. One group reported to be deeply in love, while the other had recently experienced painful breakups. As one would expect, the book contains more details about the study, not provided in the TED t I was led to this book after watching Helen Fisher’s 2006 TED talk entitled “Why we love, why we cheat.” Both the talk and the book are largely based on Fisher’s study, begun in 1996, of students at SUNY Stony Brook campus, in which the brain activities of two groups of volunteers were scanned in an MRI. One group reported to be deeply in love, while the other had recently experienced painful breakups. As one would expect, the book contains more details about the study, not provided in the TED talk, as well as additional facts and ideas. Unfortunately little of the additional material qualifies as ground-breaking or transformative. Even the additional details about the central study do little to strengthen the author’s arguments. There is plenty of information about the experiment’s setup, but much of it assumes a rather banal character and, while perhaps mildly entertaining, is not revelatory. More troubling, the 144 brain scans mentioned by the author in her TED talk turn out to be derived from merely 14 individuals – 11 women and 3 men, all college students. Although I cannot authoritatively claim that this sample size is too small or too homogenous – much time has elapsed since my college statistics course – yet I cannot avoid a feeling of suspicion that too much is being made of too small a study. What’s more, the numbers derived from the study are at times less convincing than the author would have us believe, hinting at a confirmation bias. For example, only 56% of the surveyed women agreed with the statement “My emotional state depends on how _____ feels about me”, yet this is given as further evidence of the author’s hypothesis. This is not a solitary example – on multiple occasions percentages in the low sixties, fifties, and even forties are unreservedly advanced to prove the author’s points, which aim at a generalized understanding. Overall the book seems to lack coherence and reads more like a loose collection of research abstracts, ideas, factoids, and quotes – lots of quotes, which are largely lyrical musings about the nature of love. Throughout the book, the author also shows a strong proclivity for speculation, seemingly mistaking it for theory. A theory by definition must be falsifiable, yet the author commonly uses the word to refer to what is plainly untestable conjecture, which I think is impermissible in a scientist. Unsurprisingly, the chapter most heavenly laden with such “theorizing” is the one on the evolutionary origins of love. Such speculation may be intelligent, intriguing, and entertaining, but it is not strictly scientific. Perhaps, my biggest gripe with the book though is the conclusion the author draws from her research. A good percentage of “Why We Love” is devoted to convincing us that romantic live is inherently a neurochemical addiction, not at all dissimilar from alcohol, tobacco or methamphetamine addictions either behaviorally or in its effect on the brain’s neurological pathways. In fact, this is the strongest part of the book, and the reason for my three-star rating. The presented evidence is indeed strongly in favor of the hypothesis. So, after spending so much ink proving to us that romantic love displays all the classic characteristics of a chemical addiction, what does the author propose that we do with this information? She proceeds to give us tips on how to manipulate individuals into developing romantic attachments and make romantic love last longer! Pause to consider the incongruity. This is a rational response only if one believes that the rewards of an addiction are worth the costs, and maybe the author performed the mental comparison, but if she did, she never shares these deliberations with us. As a result, the last part of the book seems oddly disconnected from the first, with the gap bridged by undisclosed value assumptions. To recap, the book contains enough interesting ideas and data to stimulate thinking but fails to weave them into a coherent theoretical framework or a transformative narrative. Aside from monetary motivations, I am hard pressed to find reasons why this should not have been a TEDBook or a Kindle Single. After coming across Dr Helen Fisher's videos on YouTube, I decided to buy this (and her follow-up book, which I'm reading now), as I thought it was about bloody time someone tried to explain, without whimsy, why we love. According to her research, love is a drive, not simply a feeling. It stems from a place in the brain as all other drives (so love really is a need, like sleep, hunger, etc), and is basically located in our 'reward centre'. When love is felt and reciprocated, we feel the reward o After coming across Dr Helen Fisher's videos on YouTube, I decided to buy this (and her follow-up book, which I'm reading now), as I thought it was about bloody time someone tried to explain, without whimsy, why we love. According to her research, love is a drive, not simply a feeling. It stems from a place in the brain as all other drives (so love really is a need, like sleep, hunger, etc), and is basically located in our 'reward centre'. When love is felt and reciprocated, we feel the reward of loving - fantastic. When it is spurned or unrequited, we literally feel like life isn't worth living (at least for a time), and this is why so many people do crazy things when in love, from losing all integrity to killing someone or themselves. It is a most powerful drug. The effects of love are also likened to the effects of cocaine (and this makes me wonder if this is the real reason people take drugs - trying to fulfill a need they're lacking). Fisher also speaks of animals in love, although thinks that humans evolved a more complex way of loving to suit their changing way of life. And that it's all to do with the mating game (which somewhat irks me, seeing as I don't feel maternal at all and have never wanted children). Apparently, we love in three different ways and can love more than one person at once. She believes there is lust, so we feel sexually attracted to whoever takes our fancy (in an effort to spread our DNA and reproduce.); romantic love, so we concentrate our efforts on one person at a time (and this is the most exciting and addictive phase of love); and attachment, so we can pair with a long term partner (at least long enough to raise a young child before moving on, so between 2 and 4 years. I think if you're going to get married, you should do it after the 4 year mark). You can experience all three at once, or just one with one person, while feeling the other two for two others! Love is certainly complex. Of course, jealousy will rear its ugly head too, and this is also normal and part of nature's design, which is known as 'mate guarding'. The only downside I found with this book was that it didn't really go into too much detail about the brain and its chemicals which drive us. There is some talk on it, of course, and I know she wrote this for the layman, but I think she spent too much time on talking about animals and her theory of the evolution of love. I'm now reading her next book 'Why Him? About why we choose the person/people we do, and the four major personality types, which she believes help us find someone we click with for relationships. Fisher's book Why we Love is a book about evolutionary biology and its mechanism the biological chemicals to explain the underpinings of mating strategies and romanic love in specific. I think she does a great job weaving poems, famous passages, and myths in order to give feeling to the analytical side of evolutionary biology. Fisher states that lust, romantic love, and attachment came about because of specific need in mating strategies in order for our species to be prolific. She thinks that lus Fisher's book Why we Love is a book about evolutionary biology and its mechanism the biological chemicals to explain the underpinings of mating strategies and romanic love in specific. I think she does a great job weaving poems, famous passages, and myths in order to give feeling to the analytical side of evolutionary biology. Fisher states that lust, romantic love, and attachment came about because of specific need in mating strategies in order for our species to be prolific. She thinks that lust and its associated neurotransmitter, testosterone made people and men in particular interested in the opposite sex. This interest made it easier for us to 'go forth and multiply.' Where as lust made us interested in the opposite sex, romantic love and its associated neurotransmitter dopamine came about so we can focus on one specific love one until the moment of conception. And attachment and its associated neurotransmitter vasopressin/oxytocin was created so we can raise a family. I also found the book illuminating in explaing the importance of romantic love in the evolutinary history of mankind. The bards were right romantic love is not superfulous but rather it is an important aspect of mating. I also found the book informative in keeping the flames of romantic love hot way after the initial cooling. Fisher states in ordr to do this one has to keep dopamine around especially as it is associated to your love one. Practically speakng, you keep dopamine flowing by having an exciting job that you love, doing new, novel, and exciting experiences with your love one (travel to new places, eat exotic foods, and take a classes together), continue to expand your own personal horizons and share it with your love one. Fisher also recommends having some personal space with your love one because as the old saying goes, 'absence make the heart grow fonder' within reason of course. I think in my personal life it translates to seeing your SO 3 or 4 days out of the week. Helen Fisher's Why We Love is a tour de force of the science on love. Every applicable social science is brought into play, from sociology to neuroscience, we get a look at why humans behave the way they do when they're enthralled. Helen Fisher is an anthropologist who primarily wants to look at the evolutionary reasons why we love, however, and she does this exceedingly well: we look at love from the 'big picture' view of mammals, to that of the homo genus's ascendency to man, to that of the hi Helen Fisher's Why We Love is a tour de force of the science on love. Every applicable social science is brought into play, from sociology to neuroscience, we get a look at why humans behave the way they do when they're enthralled. Helen Fisher is an anthropologist who primarily wants to look at the evolutionary reasons why we love, however, and she does this exceedingly well: we look at love from the 'big picture' view of mammals, to that of the homo genus's ascendency to man, to that of the historical change from hunter-gather to that of cosmopolitan man and woman. Along the way, we look at the neuroscience of the brain in love, where Fisher cites her brain scanner study, as well as the cognitive and sociological study of love. Interlaced between this history and science is a wealth of art: quotes from plays, poems, and historical figures liter her word-scape. We're given a birds eye view on the complete centrality of love to the human condition. In no uncertain terms, she reveals to us that love affects every human of every age, and that the pain and joy of it is experienced by us all. This all-encompassing view is also normative: We learn that we can and should manipulate the way that we love, and we should change our environment to favor the formation and continuation of love bonds. On the Kindle edition you can see where other have highlighted different sections, and the portion of the book that describes how to maintain love is, unsurprisingly, highlighted by many, many people. Most people ought to read this book, from the ailing teen to the keen philosopher. Helen Fisher writes with words that make love sound exciting and wondrous. Her diction and sentence structure is lovely so that can feel the passion for love. Her paragraphs lead into each other and flow, and her inclusion of tiny subtopics within the chapters that juxtapose the genders fits the book's nature. The content of the book, however, lacks greatly. The book was packed with quotes from well known writers. These only somewhat connected to the following topics in the paragraphs. There wer Helen Fisher writes with words that make love sound exciting and wondrous. Her diction and sentence structure is lovely so that can feel the passion for love. Her paragraphs lead into each other and flow, and her inclusion of tiny subtopics within the chapters that juxtapose the genders fits the book's nature. The content of the book, however, lacks greatly. The book was packed with quotes from well known writers. These only somewhat connected to the following topics in the paragraphs. There were also many foreign, ancient stories to show love in different cultures, but again, they lack a purpose in the book. In her pattern of presenting knowledge, after the quote or story, Fisher presents a statistic from a study or survey that she or her friends did. The statistic is plainly spat out onto paper. At times I felt as though I was just reading a long, written out lab report. Once you get through the first few chapters, the book finally gets into the actual nature and chemistry of love. These chapters are much more interesting. From this, I actually learned something new. The statistics from the studies actually fit in with the chemistry material. Unfortunately, the quotes and stories don't work in this section of the book at all. Only after an enormous amount of unnecessary material did the book actually have content. I feel like I hardly got anything from this book, and I regret spending my time to read it. 'Why We Love' fails to answer the very provocative question in poses| Disappointingly, it is more pop and less anthropology; she does not even offer a nuanced understanding of the various cultures she discusses (i.e. Australia, Japan)| The most interesting parts of the book were the poets and thinkers the writer decided to quote, but her writing did a poor job of converting those creative expressions into a strong, informative narrative; it was also surprising that there is only a weak discuss 'Why We Love' fails to answer the very provocative question in poses| Disappointingly, it is more pop and less anthropology; she does not even offer a nuanced understanding of the various cultures she discusses (i.e. Australia, Japan)| The most interesting parts of the book were the poets and thinkers the writer decided to quote, but her writing did a poor job of converting those creative expressions into a strong, informative narrative; it was also surprising that there is only a weak discussion around statistical findings and no real diagrams throughout the book. I have read a book about similar topic on brain chemistry. This book strengthens the idea. So basically there is 3 kinds of love. Sexual desire, romantic, and attachment. These 3 could exist at the same time toward same person (if you are lucky, but rarely), toward different people at same time (mostly in this case). Fisher said we could actually have strong attachment to our spouses but feel like having romantic feeling with a colleague at office, and totally sexually aroused just by a porn vid I have read a book about similar topic on brain chemistry. This book strengthens the idea. So basically there is 3 kinds of love. Sexual desire, romantic, and attachment. These 3 could exist at the same time toward same person (if you are lucky, but rarely), toward different people at same time (mostly in this case). Fisher said we could actually have strong attachment to our spouses but feel like having romantic feeling with a colleague at office, and totally sexually aroused just by a porn video or photos. She actually discussed in the book that does sex lead to romantic feeling and attachment?? On the scientific fMRI result, the activation of sexual desire and other 2 are different spots. That means, a funny phenomenon among women's brain. They thought they could win a man's heart through offering sex, they believe eventually this man would fall in love with her because he adores having sex with her and can not live without her. But the truth is not quite same, it's different chemistry. Therefore women still use their body, trying to show off their body are dummies, because what she offers are not going to get her to real love. Don't complain about assholes come just for sex, because you can only offer this product. You don't want the flies, don't offer honey. Talk about quantum physics with men see how many stay!! Why humans are monogamy? Why we know we can't love just one for life, we still trap ourselves into this system?? It's all in genes and evolution. In our brains, we have DNA (among most mammals) that releases 'vasopressin' into our blood which generates 'attachment'. Oxytocin and vasopressin are 2 key elements for a person stay in love and grow attachment toward your partner. My thought: Therefore people with more Oxytocin and vasopressin pass down because of the need of men to attach to their women and share the 'taking care of kids'. But when we think about nowadays there are still bunch of assholes who abandon their kids and wife then you wonder how come this person doesn't got eliminated in gene pool ( since tracked backward to his ancestors who lacked of Oxytocin and vasopressin would have less chance to got survival rate on their kids. Hard for a woman to take care of kids all alone without the protection from her men. ) My conclusion is the mothers must be strong and tough enough to survive and help pass down this heartless gene. Now the assholes prosper because women are more equal and stronger, they can raise the kids without men. After all, we are just like machines with chemical reactions. Fisher is an anthropology professor and human behavior researcher at the Rutgers University and is one of the major researchers in the field of romantic interpersonal attraction.Prior to becoming a research professor at Rutgers University, she was a research associate at the American Museum of Natural History in New York City. By many accounts, Fisher is considered the world’s leading expe Helen E. Fisher is an anthropology professor and human behavior researcher at the Rutgers University and is one of the major researchers in the field of romantic interpersonal attraction.Prior to becoming a research professor at Rutgers University, she was a research associate at the American Museum of Natural History in New York City. By many accounts, Fisher is considered the world’s leading expert on the topic of love. Presently, Fisher is the most referenced scholar in the love research community. In 2005, she was hired by match.com to help structure the chemistry.com pair-matching website using both hormonal-based and personality-based matching techniques. Blog gubitak misicne mase na nogama - Incongruously, scissors subsist your acquaintance. 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